There was an old Italian man who had moved to the US in his youth. He
worked hard his whole life at a fruit stand, frugally saving every
penny he could, investing money in stocks. When the time came to
retire, he had made enough to have his dream house built.

He hired an architect and eagerly started planning out his mansion.
After working out most of the rest, the architect asked if there was
anything special the Italian man wanted to include.

"Yes," he said, "I-a allus-a want one of-a those-a hollow estatues
at-a the bottom of-a the stairs!"

"No problem!" said the architect, "I'll pick a really beautiful one!"

Comes the day for the grand opening of the house, and the Italian
man's first look at it. He goes inside and excitedly runs around the
house, looking at everything and exclaiming "Yes, yes! That's-a just
how I want it!". He gets to the foot of the stairs and sees a stunning
porcelain Venus De Milo on a pedestal.

He turns to the architect and says "'ey! What's-a that?"

The architect, somewhat baffled, says, "That's the hollow statue you
asked for."

"No, no, no!" the Italian man replies, shouting in the architect's
face and waving his hands, "I no-a ask for that, I wanna hollow
estatue!"

"Well, I'm afraid I don't understand. Could you explain to me what
you want?" the architect asked.

In the patient voice used on small children, the Italian man
carefully said, "I want-a that-a thing. It sit-a on the table. It-a
say 'Ring ring'. You pick-a it up and say-a . . . "hallo, estat you?"