An Indian chief was feeling very sick, so he summoned
the medicine man.

After a brief examination, the medicine man took out a long, thin
strip of elk hide and gave it to the chief, instructing him to bite
off, chew and swallow one inch of the leather every day.

After a month, the medicine man returned to see how the
chief was feeling.

The chief shrugged and said, "The thong is ended, but
the malady lingers on."

A thief broke into the local police station and stole all the lavatory
equipment. A spokesperson was quoted as saying, "We have
absolutely nothing to go on."