On the First Day..... We give thanks for the fresh turkey feast
and its hot trimmings.

On the Second Day..... We bless the cold turkey sandwiches,
slushy cranberry sauce, and hard rolls.

On the Third Day..... We praise the turkey pie and vintage mixed
veggies.

On the Fourth Day..... We thank the pilgrims for not serving bison
that first time, or we'd be celebrating Thanksgiving until April.

On the Fifth Day..... We gobble up cubed bird casserole and pray for
a glimpse of a naked turkey carcass.

On the Sixth Day..... We show gratitude (sort of) to the creative cook
who slings cashews at the turkey and calls it Oriental.

On the Seventh Day..... We forgive our forefathers and pass the
turkey-nugget pizza.

On the Eighth Day..... The word ''vegetarian'' keeps popping into
our heads.

On the Ninth Day..... We check our hair to make sure we're not beginning
to sprout feathers.

On the Tenth Day..... We hope that the wing meat kabobs catch fire under
the broiler.

On the Eleventh Day..... We smile over the creamed gizzard because the
thigh bones are in sight.

On the Twelfth Day..... We apologize for running out of turkey leftovers..
..and everybody says Amen!!!