Somebody said a mother is an unskilled laborer ...
somebody never gave a squirmy infant a bath.

Somebody said it takes about six weeks to get back to
normal after you've had a baby...somebody doesn't know
that once you're a mother, normal is history.

Somebody said a mother's job consists of wiping noses
and changing diapers...somebody doesn't know that a
child is much more than the shell he lives in.

Somebody said you learn how to be a mother by
instinct...somebody never took a three-year-old shopping.

Somebody said being a mother is boring...somebody never
rode in a car driven by a teenager with a driver's permit.

Somebody said teachers, psychologists, and pediatricians
know more about children than their mothers...somebody
hasn't invested her heart in another human being.

Somebody said if you're a "good" mother, your child
will "turn out"...somebody thinks a child is like a bag
of Plaster of Paris that comes with directions, a mold,
and a guarantee.

Somebody said being a mother is what you do in your
spare time ...somebody doesn't know that when you're a
mother, you're a mother ALL the time.

Somebody said "good" mothers never raise their
voices...somebody never came out the back door just in
time to see her child wind up and hit a golf ball
through the neighbor's kitchen window.

Somebody said you don't need an education to be a
mother...somebody never helped a fourth grader with his math.

Somebody said you can't love the fifth child as much as
you love the first...somebody doesn't have five children.

Somebody said a mother can find all the answers to her
child-rearing questions in the books...somebody never
had a child stuff beans up his nose.

Somebody said the hardest part of being a mother is
labor and delivery...somebody never watched her "baby"
get on the bus for the first day of kindergarten.

Somebody said a mother can do her job with her eyes
closed and one hand tied behind her back...somebody
never organized seven giggling Brownies to sell cookies.

Somebody said a mother can stop worrying after her child
gets married...somebody doesn't know that marriage adds
a new son or daughter-in-law to a mother's heartstrings.

Somebody said a mother's job is done when her last child
leaves home...somebody never had grandchildren.

Somebody said being a mother is a side dish on the plate
of life...somebody doesn't know what fills you up.

Somebody said your mother knows you love her, so you
don't need to tell her...somebody isn't a mother.