A small town prosecuting attorney called his first witness
to the stand in a trial -- a grand motherly, elderly woman.
He approached her and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?"

She responded, "Why, yes, I do know you Mr. Williams. I've
known you since you were a young boy, and frankly, you've
been a big disappointment to me. You lie, cheat on your
wife, you manipulate people, and talk aboutthem behind their
backs. You think you're a rising big shot when you haven't the
brains to realize you never will amount to anything more than
a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you."

The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he
pointed across the room and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you
know the defense attorney?"

She again replied, "Why, yes I do. I've known Mr. Bradley
since he was a youngster too. I used to baby-sit him for
his parents. And he, too, has been a real disappointment to
me. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. The
man can't build a normal relationship with anyone and his
law practice is one of the shoddiest in the entire state. Yes,
I know him."

At this point, the judge rapped the courtroomto silence,
and called both counselors to the bench. In a very quiet
voice, he said with menace, "If either of you asks her if
she knows me, you'll be jailed for contempt!"