And God populated the earth with broccoli
and cauliflower and spinach,
green and yellow vegetable of all kinds, so Man and Woman would live
long and healthy lives.
And Satan created McDonald's. And McDonald's
brought forth the 99-cent
double-cheeseburger. And Satan said to Man, "You want fries with
that?"
And Man said, "Super size them." And Man
gained pounds.
And God created the healthful yogurt, that
woman might keep her figure
that man found so fair.
And Satan brought forth chocolate. And
woman gained pounds.
And God said, "Try my crispy fresh
salad."
And Satan brought forth ice cream. And
woman gained pounds.
And God said, "I have sent you heart healthy
vegetables and olive oil with
which to cook them."
And Satan brought forth chicken-fried steak
so big it needed its own platter.
And Man gained pounds and his bad cholesterol
went through the roof.
And God brought forth running shoes and
Man resolved to lose those extra
pounds.
And Satan brought forth cable TV with remote
control so Man would not
have to toil to change channels between ESPN and ESPN2.
And Man gained pounds.
And God said, "You're running up the score,
Devil."
And God brought forth the potato, a vegetable
naturally low in fat and
brimming with nutrition.
And Satan peeled off the healthful skin
and sliced the starchy center
into chips and deep-fat fried them. And he created sour cream dip
also.
And Man clutched his remote control and
ate the potato chips swaddled
in cholesterol.
And Satan saw and said, "It is
good."
And Man went into cardiac
arrest.
And God sighed and created quadruple bypass
surgery.
And Satan created
HMOs.

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