Answers given by 11-year- olds on science exams:

To remove dust from the eye, pull the eye down over the nose.
*
For a nosebleed, put the nose much lower than the body until
the heart stops.
*
For fainting, rub the person's chest or, if a lady, rub her arm above
the hand instead. Or put the head between the knees of the nearest
medical doctor.
*
For dog bite: put the dog away for several days. If he has not
recovered, then kill it.
*
For asphyxiation: apply artificial respiration until the patient is
dead.
*
To prevent contraception: wear a condominium.
*
For head cold: use an agonizer to spray the nose until it stops in
your throat.
*
To keep milk from turning sour: keep it in the cow.
*
The pistol of a flower is its only protection against insects.
*
The skeleton is what is left after the insides have been taken out and
the outsides have been taken off. The purpose of the skeleton is
something to hitch meat to.
*
A permanent set of teeth consists of eight canines, eight cuspids, two
molars, and eight cuspidors.
*
The tides are a fight between the Earth and Moon. All water tends
towards the moon, because there is no water in the moon, and nature
abhors a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight.
*
A fossil is an extinct animal. The older it is, the more extinct it is.
*
Germinate: To become a naturalized German.
*
Liter: A nest of young puppies.
*
Magnet: Something you find crawling all over a dead cat.